where am I? who am I? what is going on? why do the days keep melting in to each other and whizzing by so fast? is this the way it's going to be for the rest of my life?
On the way home tonight I wondered if I have an unrealistic expectation that things will 'return to normal'. What the hell does that mean?! When summers stretched for what seemed like an eternity? When my sense of time passing was slower. What makes that happen? Because the minutes ticking by when you are younger take up more time proportionately to how long you've been on the planet? Maybe I need to eat more root vegetables, to like, ground myself, man.
Maybe meditation really does work for grounding and slowing it down. I try to be aware of what I am doing all the time...not hyper aware...just, like, aware, man. Even aware of when my brain is just chattering and nattering away, taking up synaptic power, blah blah blah. I guess it's called being 'present'. The being aware, not the blah blah blah.
It's like...when I do art. Time does a wonky thing. It slows down in some ways and speeds up in others. I love being absorbed and focused, that gives a real sense of time passing. And I can look at what I've done, too - evidence of time passing. But also, there is a timeless quality to the focused-ness. And I look up and oh my god, two hours have passed? Wow.
So last night I started on some stuff that I can't post quite yet...oh okay, I'll post the picture of the art doll I made! It's more like a zuni fetish voodoo art doll. I think it will be a complete and utter surprise for the recipient (gulp). I think I need to make MORE MORE MORE!
god, now it looks like she fell from a high cliff - she's okay, no worries.
camera had trouble focusing...maybe I will be able to snap some better shots tomorrow, with natural lighting. I really loved making this crazy girl though!
Also did a carving and a print, ATC-sized. Based on a panel from Michael Manning's graphic novel - Cathexis:
Also replaced the Mail Art stamp that finally gave up the ghost - dang but I love carving up erasers!
And now, one last glance at the gorgeous moon (quite big-looking and glowey yellow here tonight) and then conkers la la land for me, I'm sleepy. Went over to some friend's house tonight, we all sat around and did our art. Was so nice! Would've been nice if it was winter too, but...I LOVE SUMMER!! All the doors open, bare feet with toes curled on linoleum while I concentrate, Josie asking in her talking voice (not barking and yipping...Josie dosn't yip) for a W...sorry Josie, no walk tonight....what a great evening.