je regrette

It's friday and I'm illustrating for this week's theme: sorry. I'm also illustrating a dream I had, so - dual purpose, once again. The dream is many years old. From even before my mother died. In the dream, I was standing above her, on a staircase of some sort. I saw her spiraling down, with her hands in her pockets, away from me, head bowed. She looked so lonely. I saw her as such, and I'm sure she felt that way too. But in many ways I was younger when I had that dream...we're both big girls now, even if she really isn't getting any older while I am. I like to think my perspective has broadened and deepened. They say that everyone in your dream is a projection of yourself. For this and other reasons I took a picture of myself to base the illustration on for perspective (literally and figuratively). I'm sorry we didn't get to really patch things up before she died.

When it comes down to it, the real patching up occurs within yourself, whether or not someone is around (in body or spirit or whatever) to do it too.

Interesting that yesterday's post is titled 'je ne regret pas'...n'est ce pas??

And it's interesting also that I am listening to Love and Rocket's LIFT and I do believe he is singing So Sorry, in Party's Not Over Yet. I could be reading into it of course. Tomorrow I could listen to it while eating a pastry that went bad and he could be singing, 'this potty's not over yet....soooo hurry!'

Happy illustrating, everyone.